Monday, April 21, 2008
YOU CAN BE A GREAT LEADER
Leadership can take on many qualities and wear many different hats. We mainly think of leaders and leadership in the way of businesses, managers and supervisors. Think about what these positions have in common. They take charge. They take care of things. This being the case that means that you, as an individual, can be a great leader with or without a business. Yes, that’s right. Be a leader of yourself and your actions. Need an explanation? Read on.Regardless as to what mountains you climb in life, you have the option of taking on the role of a leader or a follower. How you handle the situation dictates the type of person you are or will be in that particular incident. Want to be a leader? The following six steps outline how to turn being a follower into being a leader in everything you tackle in life and how to control a situation rather than the situation taking control of you.1. Success Methods There are proven methods used by highly successful people that help them achieve what they want in life. The most successful people—those who achieve the goals they set out to achieve and live fulfilling lives—demonstrate certain traits and actions. They are organized, disciplined, curious, open to learning and growing, fearless (or willing to act in spite of fear), positive-minded, and persistent. They take action, measure their results, and change course when necessary.2. Setting goalsSetting goals outlines your intentions for what you plan to do and makes it real to you. Goals are not results! Many people are afraid to set goals because they are afraid of what happens if they "fail" to achieve them. They believe that it negatively affects their self-image. Nothing could be further from the truth. One of the most positive aspects of goals is what not achieving a goal teaches you. If you don't achieve a goal, there can be any number of reasons why, some of which are beyond your control. However, examining why it was not achieved will yield valuable insights into your beliefs, attitudes and emotions.3. Think creatively and don't stop at the obvious Think about options available to you and envision the possibilities of bigger and better ways to do things. Develop the skill of having multiple options instead of settling for the easiest or fastest answer. Explore different possibilities and ask 'what if' questions. Discover new solutions for the old problems - don't take the easy way. When you think you have the answer, think of something else you can do to make it better.4. Your word is your truth Know that when you speak, you will fulfill your promise to others and others will know they can depend on you. Think before you speak. Under promise and over deliver. Always keep your promise, especially promises that you make to yourself.5. Clarity brings accomplishmentOne of the most important things you can do to effectively manage your day, week, month or year is to get clear on what it is you want to achieve. When you lose track of your goals or fail to plan appropriately, you end up spinning in circles and nothing gets accomplished. The clearer you are on your goals, the better results you will get. Make sure your goals are personal to you and not part of someone else's expectations. You will be far more motivated to achieve success when you are working toward something that really matters to you.6. Celebrate! Sit still after an accomplishment and savor the feelings of success. We need to reward ourselves in nurturing ways and celebrate not only our results but our efforts. Just in moving toward your goals you are ahead of many people who simply write them out and then do nothing. Remember the rewards are in the journey as well as in the results. Enjoy the process and celebrate often.
Tuesday, April 1, 2008
LET OTHER PEOPLE SEE WHO YOU ARE
Do you know anybody that you consider to be particularly engaging and lively? Take a moment to picture that person in your mind. What is it about that person that you find most attractive? He or she may have a charming voice and a great laugh, but it is also very likely that you find their face very expressive. That person is probably quick to smile and laugh and seems to always have a twinkle in their eye.
A face that never shows any emotion, and never smiles is not very appealing. No matter how attractive or how plain a person’s facial features may be, a great smile can make that person look beautiful to others. When you smile at other people, they will assume that you are in a good mood and that you are happy to see them. This will make other people more likely to want to spend time with you and to know you better.
Allowing our face to show emotions is actually an advantage in developing relationships. Other people are constantly trying to read and respond to our body language and facial expressions, often on a subconscious level. They are trying to sense whether we really care about them or not, whether we are concerned with what is going on in their lives.
If you are a person who is very emotionally sensitive, this sensitivity can be an asset in forming relationships. Use your sensitivity to show empathy for other people. Don’t suppress your emotions, trying to be “cool”. Don’t waste your sensitive nature being sensitive only to yourself and your own emotions. Imagine being in the shoes of the person you are talking with, and let yourself feel the sadness, happiness, excitement or pride that is present in the story they are telling you.
If we repress all our emotions from showing on our face, people will feel frustrated trying to get a sense of who we really are. When we let our emotions show up on our face, sharing in our conversation partner’s joys and sorrows, worries and frustrations, as well as their hope and excitement, both of us feel less alone. Both people will feel more connected to each other.
Sometimes we worry about our facial expressions. We may sense that our smile looks forced, or makes us look nervous. We may worry that we don’t smile enough, or that we frown too much.
One way you can check on your facial expressions is to have yourself videotaped in conversation with another person. When you review the tape, does your smile looks forced, or natural? Do you look extremely serious? Are you able to portray a feeling of fun and light-heartedness?
If you are not able to analyze the tape effectively by yourself, have someone else you trust give you some feedback.
If you think your facial expressiveness could be improved, you can practice in front of a mirror. Watch your face as you imagine yourself feeling various positive and negative emotions. Imagine yourself hearing a very funny joke. Or winning the lottery. Or receiving a nice compliment. Meeting your neighbor. Getting a present. Having a secret.
Also imagine yourself experiencing negative situations and watch your facial expressions in the mirror. Exaggerate them. Switch back to imagining positive emotions. Are you normally this expressive? Do you let other people see the real you? Or do you try to hide yourself from everyone? Do you like the person you see in the mirror?
Your smiles and other facial expressions will be more natural and more appealing when you are relaxed, rather than tense. If you get nervous when you are talking with others, you may find it helpful to practice body relaxation techniques until you can easily relax at will. Consciously tell all the muscles in your body to relax, even if you have to give instructions mentally to each part of your body, one section at a time. When you are with other people, let your mental focus be on enjoying the situation you are in, rather than imagining what others are thinking about you, or worrying what you will say next.
Let you emotions come from deep within you, and spread to your face, rather than trying to artificially manufacture facial expressions.
You are blessed.
A face that never shows any emotion, and never smiles is not very appealing. No matter how attractive or how plain a person’s facial features may be, a great smile can make that person look beautiful to others. When you smile at other people, they will assume that you are in a good mood and that you are happy to see them. This will make other people more likely to want to spend time with you and to know you better.
Allowing our face to show emotions is actually an advantage in developing relationships. Other people are constantly trying to read and respond to our body language and facial expressions, often on a subconscious level. They are trying to sense whether we really care about them or not, whether we are concerned with what is going on in their lives.
If you are a person who is very emotionally sensitive, this sensitivity can be an asset in forming relationships. Use your sensitivity to show empathy for other people. Don’t suppress your emotions, trying to be “cool”. Don’t waste your sensitive nature being sensitive only to yourself and your own emotions. Imagine being in the shoes of the person you are talking with, and let yourself feel the sadness, happiness, excitement or pride that is present in the story they are telling you.
If we repress all our emotions from showing on our face, people will feel frustrated trying to get a sense of who we really are. When we let our emotions show up on our face, sharing in our conversation partner’s joys and sorrows, worries and frustrations, as well as their hope and excitement, both of us feel less alone. Both people will feel more connected to each other.
Sometimes we worry about our facial expressions. We may sense that our smile looks forced, or makes us look nervous. We may worry that we don’t smile enough, or that we frown too much.
One way you can check on your facial expressions is to have yourself videotaped in conversation with another person. When you review the tape, does your smile looks forced, or natural? Do you look extremely serious? Are you able to portray a feeling of fun and light-heartedness?
If you are not able to analyze the tape effectively by yourself, have someone else you trust give you some feedback.
If you think your facial expressiveness could be improved, you can practice in front of a mirror. Watch your face as you imagine yourself feeling various positive and negative emotions. Imagine yourself hearing a very funny joke. Or winning the lottery. Or receiving a nice compliment. Meeting your neighbor. Getting a present. Having a secret.
Also imagine yourself experiencing negative situations and watch your facial expressions in the mirror. Exaggerate them. Switch back to imagining positive emotions. Are you normally this expressive? Do you let other people see the real you? Or do you try to hide yourself from everyone? Do you like the person you see in the mirror?
Your smiles and other facial expressions will be more natural and more appealing when you are relaxed, rather than tense. If you get nervous when you are talking with others, you may find it helpful to practice body relaxation techniques until you can easily relax at will. Consciously tell all the muscles in your body to relax, even if you have to give instructions mentally to each part of your body, one section at a time. When you are with other people, let your mental focus be on enjoying the situation you are in, rather than imagining what others are thinking about you, or worrying what you will say next.
Let you emotions come from deep within you, and spread to your face, rather than trying to artificially manufacture facial expressions.
You are blessed.
Wednesday, March 19, 2008
IF YOU WANT OTHERS TO LIKE YOU,LIKE YOURSELF FIRST
Many of us mistakenly believe that it’s wrong or conceited, to think we have any good qualities. We may spend a lot of time berating ourselves for our negative qualities, thinking that self criticism is the key to improving our performance. However, a constant focus on our supposed shortcomings can hinder our efforts to make friends with other people.
How can we have the confidence to make new friends if we think we don’t have much to offer? How can we believe that others could like us if we believe our inner being is flawed? Or if we think we are too boring to interest anyone else?
We may wonder what anyone else would see in us if we don’t see any good in ourselves. In order for others to be attracted to us, they must be able to easily see our best qualities. If we focus on our good qualities we will have much more confidence that we have something of value to offer in a relationship.
If you wish to be socially successful, it’s important to accept the fact that not everybody is going to like you under all circumstances. Not everyone is going to like the package you come in, especially on first meeting you. Every person has a unique patterns of likes and dislikes which were formed long before they met you. Don’t think you have to condemn yourself as a failure if it seems that someone else doesn’t like you.
If someone seems to dislike you, the reason for that dislike might have little or nothing to do with you. The person who doesn’t like you might be fearful, or shallow, or busy or shy. Perhaps you and that person are simply a mismatch for each other at this particular time.
Don’t take yourself out of the game by deciding that your flaws are bigger than your assets. In fact, some of the very qualities you consider to be flaws may be irresistible to someone else. For all the factors that might cause one person to reject you, there are at least as many factors that will work in your favor with someone else.
You might be thirty pounds over your ideal weight, but you may have a wonderful laugh and a huge zest for life. There are many people to whom your extra pounds will literally be invisible. You may drive a shabby car, but you might be a great dancer and a loyal friend. There are people out there looking for loyalty, or fun, or sweetness, or wit, and the package it comes in is not important.
If you are worried that you are not beautiful enough to attract friends, keep in mind that not everyone is looking for physical beauty in their friends.
You can decide to feel inferior because you don’t have much money and you don’t drive a nice car. You can believe that this is the reason that you don’t have many friends in your life. On the other hand, if you are very wealthy you may be suspicious that everyone is after your money and that nobody really likes you as a person.
The point is, you can fixate on just about anything and believe it’s the reason you do not have friends and cannot make any.
Here is an easy way to remind yourself of what your good qualities are: write down a list of your good qualities and review it often. Don’t just think in your mind about what your good qualities might be, actually make the effort to write the list. The act of writing helps to reinforce the strength of the ideas in your mind. Don’t be embarrassed to give yourself credit for your good points. If you don’t have any idea what your good points might be, you might want to ask some of the people you know.
When you compile your list of good qualities, be as generous in your praise as your best friend in the whole wide world would be! If you don’t have any best friends yet, imagine in your mind a wise and loving friend who knows you truly and appreciates you. What would that person say are your good points?
Here are some ideas that might be applicable to you. Feel free to adjust this list for yourself and add to it.
My good qualities are:
· I’m kind
· I never gossip
· I go out of my way to help others
· I’m good with numbers
· I have a calm disposition
· I know a lot about sports
You can keep your list with you and read it over every day. Add to it whenever you think of new good qualities you discover in yourself. Be alert for compliments that other people give you. The positive qualities that others see in you can go on your list as well.
When you are out there meeting people, frequently remind yourself of all the wonderful qualities you have. It’s only a matter of time before you meet other people who will appreciate them too!
Learn to relax. Instead of berating yourself for some perceived shortcoming, concentrate on the good qualities you have to offer. Realize that there is an audience for your particular combination of gifts, and go looking for those people who will appreciate them.
God bless you.
How can we have the confidence to make new friends if we think we don’t have much to offer? How can we believe that others could like us if we believe our inner being is flawed? Or if we think we are too boring to interest anyone else?
We may wonder what anyone else would see in us if we don’t see any good in ourselves. In order for others to be attracted to us, they must be able to easily see our best qualities. If we focus on our good qualities we will have much more confidence that we have something of value to offer in a relationship.
If you wish to be socially successful, it’s important to accept the fact that not everybody is going to like you under all circumstances. Not everyone is going to like the package you come in, especially on first meeting you. Every person has a unique patterns of likes and dislikes which were formed long before they met you. Don’t think you have to condemn yourself as a failure if it seems that someone else doesn’t like you.
If someone seems to dislike you, the reason for that dislike might have little or nothing to do with you. The person who doesn’t like you might be fearful, or shallow, or busy or shy. Perhaps you and that person are simply a mismatch for each other at this particular time.
Don’t take yourself out of the game by deciding that your flaws are bigger than your assets. In fact, some of the very qualities you consider to be flaws may be irresistible to someone else. For all the factors that might cause one person to reject you, there are at least as many factors that will work in your favor with someone else.
You might be thirty pounds over your ideal weight, but you may have a wonderful laugh and a huge zest for life. There are many people to whom your extra pounds will literally be invisible. You may drive a shabby car, but you might be a great dancer and a loyal friend. There are people out there looking for loyalty, or fun, or sweetness, or wit, and the package it comes in is not important.
If you are worried that you are not beautiful enough to attract friends, keep in mind that not everyone is looking for physical beauty in their friends.
You can decide to feel inferior because you don’t have much money and you don’t drive a nice car. You can believe that this is the reason that you don’t have many friends in your life. On the other hand, if you are very wealthy you may be suspicious that everyone is after your money and that nobody really likes you as a person.
The point is, you can fixate on just about anything and believe it’s the reason you do not have friends and cannot make any.
Here is an easy way to remind yourself of what your good qualities are: write down a list of your good qualities and review it often. Don’t just think in your mind about what your good qualities might be, actually make the effort to write the list. The act of writing helps to reinforce the strength of the ideas in your mind. Don’t be embarrassed to give yourself credit for your good points. If you don’t have any idea what your good points might be, you might want to ask some of the people you know.
When you compile your list of good qualities, be as generous in your praise as your best friend in the whole wide world would be! If you don’t have any best friends yet, imagine in your mind a wise and loving friend who knows you truly and appreciates you. What would that person say are your good points?
Here are some ideas that might be applicable to you. Feel free to adjust this list for yourself and add to it.
My good qualities are:
· I’m kind
· I never gossip
· I go out of my way to help others
· I’m good with numbers
· I have a calm disposition
· I know a lot about sports
You can keep your list with you and read it over every day. Add to it whenever you think of new good qualities you discover in yourself. Be alert for compliments that other people give you. The positive qualities that others see in you can go on your list as well.
When you are out there meeting people, frequently remind yourself of all the wonderful qualities you have. It’s only a matter of time before you meet other people who will appreciate them too!
Learn to relax. Instead of berating yourself for some perceived shortcoming, concentrate on the good qualities you have to offer. Realize that there is an audience for your particular combination of gifts, and go looking for those people who will appreciate them.
God bless you.
Thursday, March 6, 2008
GOAL SETTINGS AND RELATIONSHIPS
That is not as weird as it may sound. Consider the following definition of a goal: "A goal is a future incidence or event that is consciously worked towards." With this in mind, it is perfectly normal to make it your goal to improve your relationship, and these seven goal setting tools can help you.
A great relationship is one of the finest things life can offer. When you choose your partner and start on a full-time relationship, you look forward to a future of love, support, encouragement, communication and intimacy. We enter into relationships for many different reasons and with many different expectations. Often, due to circumstances outside your control, a relationship can become a little tarnished.
You recognize that all people are different and that even the most compatible couple will have individual needs that differ at times. Using just the seven goal setting tools discussed in this article takes a give and take approach. Partners in a relationship who adopt this give and take attitude often feel a sense of pride in modifying a need "downward" when they know it will satisfy and stabilize their partner and the relationship itself. Mutual giving flourishes in an atmosphere of cooperation.
Seven Goal Setting Tools
Listening: Communication is the key to a lasting relationship and listening is the key to communicating. Being a good listener takes more than being attentive to your partner when he or she talks with you. Good listening is a characteristic of a healthy relationship. Give your mate full attention when he or she is talking. Listening without interrupting the other shows respect and also builds trust. Sometimes the greatest gift you can give someone is just to listen - with your heart. So listening helps to improve relationship in great way.
Small things: The small things are what constitute our existence. Once the excitement your partner brings to your world becomes familiar, it's the small things that thrill you both and that will keep you connected and turned-on for the long run. Do the small things you did when you first fell in love with your mate. Remember the small things you did to show your love to your mate? But as time went by, you probably began to get weighed down with simply living life and forgot the small things that made the difference in the beginning. Small things like a phone call in the middle of the day just to talk or say, "I love you", a handwritten appreciative note, flowers, gifts, and opening doors. Re-charge your relationship by consciously going back and doing the small things that you did when your love first began to grow.
Give attention: When each person has decided to give of themselves to the other, you form a reciprocating relationship of love, concern, and devotion. Consider your mate's interests more important than your own. Give attention to your mate's interests. All healthy relationships require consistent, ongoing, conscious attention to survive and thrive. It is a simple fact that whenever we give attention to something, we are choosing to create more of it.
Say 'thank you': One of the most useful phrases in improving your relationship is to say "thank you". These two magic words will make others feel closer to you and create loyal relationships. This attitude of appreciation nourishes the heart of both participants and assures that each person's needs are attended to. Things like saying "thank you", re-charge your relationship. You know to say "thank you" when someone gives you a gift or does something special for you. However, if you're seriously interested in improving your relationship, you need to let your mate know how much you appreciate things that are not special, the things that we just take for granted because people are supposed to do them anyway. Tell your partner what is right with them, what you appreciate, value and cherish. Thank them repeatedly and often. Appreciation makes your partner feel valued. It also builds trust and a feeling of acceptance. These powerful attributes act like a magnet to attract your partner to you.
Personalized gifts: Personalized gifts are great not only for life's special occasions. Personalized gifts bring important moments to life and keep the memory alive forever. Express your feelings and show how much you care with personalized gifts. It shows your partner how much you value your relationship. Personalized gifts are always a winner because they are made exclusively for your beloved, with care and attention. Choose gifts that reflect your partner's interests. Evening wrapping your gift can be personalized. A little handwritten note expressing your gratitude can mean as much to your partner as the gift itself. Also be sure to give the gift in person. Personalized gift giving is a great way to spread goodwill and cheer amongst each other.
Feel special: Sometimes your partner likes to get noticed once in a while. We like to feel appreciated for our actions, feelings and aspirations and want to be noticed and acknowledged. Become a person who notices these things in your partner and give a compliment often. It will make your partner feel special and know how that you care. The only way our partner knows what makes us feel special is if we speak up. The gestures that make us feel special are different for each one of us. Learning how to make each other feel special takes time and an awareness. Taking this journey of self-discovery together is one of the joys of a relationship. A key to a happy relationship is a commitment to learn. It is an attitude of curiosity, discovery, and delight in each other. Learn this essential relationship wisdom, and you will make each other feel special every day.
Unconditional love: Love is the primary energy in the universe. Giving unconditional love will deliver the greatest joy possible. The term 'unconditional love' means to love without terms and conditions, which means giving of yourself. Unconditional love is accepting another for exactly who they are, not forcing the person to change to meet your expectations of how they should be. It is about giving the person the freedom to be exactly who they want to be by allowing, supporting and enabling them in every way you can. Unconditional Love is true neutrality; it does not judge or evaluate. It does not like or dislike. It does not blame, so it does not need to forgive. It does not have choices or preferences, opinions or positions. Unconditional Love does not dictate, is not authoritative. It has no expectations other than what is.
A great relationship is one of the finest things life can offer. When you choose your partner and start on a full-time relationship, you look forward to a future of love, support, encouragement, communication and intimacy. We enter into relationships for many different reasons and with many different expectations. Often, due to circumstances outside your control, a relationship can become a little tarnished.
You recognize that all people are different and that even the most compatible couple will have individual needs that differ at times. Using just the seven goal setting tools discussed in this article takes a give and take approach. Partners in a relationship who adopt this give and take attitude often feel a sense of pride in modifying a need "downward" when they know it will satisfy and stabilize their partner and the relationship itself. Mutual giving flourishes in an atmosphere of cooperation.
Seven Goal Setting Tools
Listening: Communication is the key to a lasting relationship and listening is the key to communicating. Being a good listener takes more than being attentive to your partner when he or she talks with you. Good listening is a characteristic of a healthy relationship. Give your mate full attention when he or she is talking. Listening without interrupting the other shows respect and also builds trust. Sometimes the greatest gift you can give someone is just to listen - with your heart. So listening helps to improve relationship in great way.
Small things: The small things are what constitute our existence. Once the excitement your partner brings to your world becomes familiar, it's the small things that thrill you both and that will keep you connected and turned-on for the long run. Do the small things you did when you first fell in love with your mate. Remember the small things you did to show your love to your mate? But as time went by, you probably began to get weighed down with simply living life and forgot the small things that made the difference in the beginning. Small things like a phone call in the middle of the day just to talk or say, "I love you", a handwritten appreciative note, flowers, gifts, and opening doors. Re-charge your relationship by consciously going back and doing the small things that you did when your love first began to grow.
Give attention: When each person has decided to give of themselves to the other, you form a reciprocating relationship of love, concern, and devotion. Consider your mate's interests more important than your own. Give attention to your mate's interests. All healthy relationships require consistent, ongoing, conscious attention to survive and thrive. It is a simple fact that whenever we give attention to something, we are choosing to create more of it.
Say 'thank you': One of the most useful phrases in improving your relationship is to say "thank you". These two magic words will make others feel closer to you and create loyal relationships. This attitude of appreciation nourishes the heart of both participants and assures that each person's needs are attended to. Things like saying "thank you", re-charge your relationship. You know to say "thank you" when someone gives you a gift or does something special for you. However, if you're seriously interested in improving your relationship, you need to let your mate know how much you appreciate things that are not special, the things that we just take for granted because people are supposed to do them anyway. Tell your partner what is right with them, what you appreciate, value and cherish. Thank them repeatedly and often. Appreciation makes your partner feel valued. It also builds trust and a feeling of acceptance. These powerful attributes act like a magnet to attract your partner to you.
Personalized gifts: Personalized gifts are great not only for life's special occasions. Personalized gifts bring important moments to life and keep the memory alive forever. Express your feelings and show how much you care with personalized gifts. It shows your partner how much you value your relationship. Personalized gifts are always a winner because they are made exclusively for your beloved, with care and attention. Choose gifts that reflect your partner's interests. Evening wrapping your gift can be personalized. A little handwritten note expressing your gratitude can mean as much to your partner as the gift itself. Also be sure to give the gift in person. Personalized gift giving is a great way to spread goodwill and cheer amongst each other.
Feel special: Sometimes your partner likes to get noticed once in a while. We like to feel appreciated for our actions, feelings and aspirations and want to be noticed and acknowledged. Become a person who notices these things in your partner and give a compliment often. It will make your partner feel special and know how that you care. The only way our partner knows what makes us feel special is if we speak up. The gestures that make us feel special are different for each one of us. Learning how to make each other feel special takes time and an awareness. Taking this journey of self-discovery together is one of the joys of a relationship. A key to a happy relationship is a commitment to learn. It is an attitude of curiosity, discovery, and delight in each other. Learn this essential relationship wisdom, and you will make each other feel special every day.
Unconditional love: Love is the primary energy in the universe. Giving unconditional love will deliver the greatest joy possible. The term 'unconditional love' means to love without terms and conditions, which means giving of yourself. Unconditional love is accepting another for exactly who they are, not forcing the person to change to meet your expectations of how they should be. It is about giving the person the freedom to be exactly who they want to be by allowing, supporting and enabling them in every way you can. Unconditional Love is true neutrality; it does not judge or evaluate. It does not like or dislike. It does not blame, so it does not need to forgive. It does not have choices or preferences, opinions or positions. Unconditional Love does not dictate, is not authoritative. It has no expectations other than what is.
Saturday, February 16, 2008
WINNING THE FIGHT BETWEEN THE CLOCK AND YOU
Put out the fire and your whole day goes up in smoke and you don't realize that somebody's guilty of arson.
To be successful in today's highly-competitive world you must be focused. You must have long and short-term goals.
When you know where you want to go, it's easy to determine whether or not the work, tasks, and projects you're working on will take you there.
Here are three strategies you can use to leverage your time:
1. Block out time for yourself. Close the door. Turn off the phone. And give yourself an hour of uninterrupted time each day.
2. Work on your most important work, tasks and projects. Only do the things that have value. Eliminate everything else.
3. Use your Prime Time. There's a time of day when you do your best work. When you've the most energy and enthusiasm. Tackle your most important work at the time of day you're at your best.
Set your goals. Leverage your time. And you'll become more successful than you ever dreamed.
Use your time well and you will be successful.
To be successful in today's highly-competitive world you must be focused. You must have long and short-term goals.
When you know where you want to go, it's easy to determine whether or not the work, tasks, and projects you're working on will take you there.
Here are three strategies you can use to leverage your time:
1. Block out time for yourself. Close the door. Turn off the phone. And give yourself an hour of uninterrupted time each day.
2. Work on your most important work, tasks and projects. Only do the things that have value. Eliminate everything else.
3. Use your Prime Time. There's a time of day when you do your best work. When you've the most energy and enthusiasm. Tackle your most important work at the time of day you're at your best.
Set your goals. Leverage your time. And you'll become more successful than you ever dreamed.
Use your time well and you will be successful.
Friday, February 1, 2008
A GOAL WITHOUT A PLAN IS MERELY A WISH
This is the first, and important question you need to ask yourself. Why? If your reason for setting your goal is not sincere, your motivation and enthusiasm can wane drastically as you progress on your goal path. Setting personal goals is just that - personal, and if you do not have deep-rooted reason for your goal, your chances of succeeding are reduced dramatically.
We generally set goals because we are unhappy with where we are, either in life, our job, or a relationship. As Og Mandino says, "People don't change when they feel good. They change when they're fed up. When things are going all right, we all tend to do pretty much what we've been doing. Pain pushes us to those crucial turning points. We hurt, then we finally choose. It's that adverb finally. Enough is enough.!"
We want something better. An example is a better paying position at work, or a management position. Maybe it can be that we want to lose weight, or become healthier. Whatever it is, we generally set goals as result of wanting something better.
Animals function on instinct. They sleep, eat and procreate. That's it.
We humans have a thinking ability. And it is with this thinking ability that we have the urge to achieve something better. But we are also an inherently lazy creature, and we tend to have a resistance to effort.
Goals help keep us motivated
When we have something to aim at, something we achieve, we usually become excited. Think of going to your favorite restaurant. While you're getting ready, you can almost smell and taste your meal, and you are excited. It is no different when you have a goal to aim at, and this is especially relevant if you have a life goal. Each milestone that you reach, increases your excitement, aka your motivation. Especially, think of when you go on holiday. What is your level of excitement just prior to leaving on holiday, and to what level does this excitement rise shortly before leaving? And then as you progress on your journey? Using the holiday example, this excitement keeps rising the nearer you get to your destination.
Goals undoubtedly give us direction. An example here is when we want to progress in our career.
Let's say we want to secure a management position. We increase our knowledge and experience, and as result we become more equipped for the position. It is the objective of the management position that motivates us to undergo training, for example. Our goals enable us to move forward, and moving forward can only be beneficial. Go for the gold.
Successful people are goal orientated
Whatever your definition of success is, you will find it difficult to reach that level of success without goals.
If you don't have a target, the arrow will hit nothing.
It is very important to remember that goals are not static. As our circumstances change, it is inevitable that our goals change. The goals you had when you left school are very different to your goals ten years after school. Similarly, after marriage and children come along, your goals once again change. It is important to remember that when your circumstances change, review and, where necessary adapt your goals. The golden rule of setting your goals is to remain on your goal path.
Without a doubt, having personal goals keeps your enthusiasm up.
Using a map for our holiday
It is usual for us to consult a map when we go on holiday, and yet, sadly, for the holiday of life, we don't consider consulting a map for this important journey. And when we don't reach our destination, we become frustrated and annoyed. Yet, when we go on holiday, without a map, and we get lost we similarly get annoyed. And yet, this something we don't repeatedly do. Your goals, and especially your goal path, is your map for your life.
Having goals, or at the very least, a goal, will enable you to know where you're going in life. Goals do give us direction.
Thomas Edison is well-known for saying he didn't fail, but found 10 000 ways it didn't work. He had thousands of attempts over many years to invent the electric light bulb, but he knew exactly what he wanted, and his goal kept him going until he achieved it.
Oprah Winfrey was an abused child who was determined to make a better life for herself. Michelle Kwan had a goal to be the best skater in the world.
If you want proof that goal setting works, and is valuable in your life, think of musicians. They are one of the best examples of having determination in not only setting, but also achieving their goals. Athletes don't become record holders by chance - it is only through effective goal setting. Top sales people work consciously at their goals, and as result become star performers. No-one becomes an astronaut by accident.
Every person who becomes successful in whatever field or area they choose, followed a goal path - a map to achieve their success.
Role of an effective goal setting system
If you have a dream, and want to achieve something better in life, having a goal can bring you success.
An effective goal setting system must get you on your road to success. It should also give you the tools to enable you to gain confidence in reaching your goal. There are many books and programs available that can help you set your goal. It is my belief that anyone can set a goal, but the important thing is to reach your goal.
An effective goal setting system should be a blueprint, and enable you to determine where you want to go with your life, and be an aid to keeping you on your goal path.
Having a goal, success is possible. Without goals, success is rarely possible - whatever area in your life.
We generally set goals because we are unhappy with where we are, either in life, our job, or a relationship. As Og Mandino says, "People don't change when they feel good. They change when they're fed up. When things are going all right, we all tend to do pretty much what we've been doing. Pain pushes us to those crucial turning points. We hurt, then we finally choose. It's that adverb finally. Enough is enough.!"
We want something better. An example is a better paying position at work, or a management position. Maybe it can be that we want to lose weight, or become healthier. Whatever it is, we generally set goals as result of wanting something better.
Animals function on instinct. They sleep, eat and procreate. That's it.
We humans have a thinking ability. And it is with this thinking ability that we have the urge to achieve something better. But we are also an inherently lazy creature, and we tend to have a resistance to effort.
Goals help keep us motivated
When we have something to aim at, something we achieve, we usually become excited. Think of going to your favorite restaurant. While you're getting ready, you can almost smell and taste your meal, and you are excited. It is no different when you have a goal to aim at, and this is especially relevant if you have a life goal. Each milestone that you reach, increases your excitement, aka your motivation. Especially, think of when you go on holiday. What is your level of excitement just prior to leaving on holiday, and to what level does this excitement rise shortly before leaving? And then as you progress on your journey? Using the holiday example, this excitement keeps rising the nearer you get to your destination.
Goals undoubtedly give us direction. An example here is when we want to progress in our career.
Let's say we want to secure a management position. We increase our knowledge and experience, and as result we become more equipped for the position. It is the objective of the management position that motivates us to undergo training, for example. Our goals enable us to move forward, and moving forward can only be beneficial. Go for the gold.
Successful people are goal orientated
Whatever your definition of success is, you will find it difficult to reach that level of success without goals.
If you don't have a target, the arrow will hit nothing.
It is very important to remember that goals are not static. As our circumstances change, it is inevitable that our goals change. The goals you had when you left school are very different to your goals ten years after school. Similarly, after marriage and children come along, your goals once again change. It is important to remember that when your circumstances change, review and, where necessary adapt your goals. The golden rule of setting your goals is to remain on your goal path.
Without a doubt, having personal goals keeps your enthusiasm up.
Using a map for our holiday
It is usual for us to consult a map when we go on holiday, and yet, sadly, for the holiday of life, we don't consider consulting a map for this important journey. And when we don't reach our destination, we become frustrated and annoyed. Yet, when we go on holiday, without a map, and we get lost we similarly get annoyed. And yet, this something we don't repeatedly do. Your goals, and especially your goal path, is your map for your life.
Having goals, or at the very least, a goal, will enable you to know where you're going in life. Goals do give us direction.
Thomas Edison is well-known for saying he didn't fail, but found 10 000 ways it didn't work. He had thousands of attempts over many years to invent the electric light bulb, but he knew exactly what he wanted, and his goal kept him going until he achieved it.
Oprah Winfrey was an abused child who was determined to make a better life for herself. Michelle Kwan had a goal to be the best skater in the world.
If you want proof that goal setting works, and is valuable in your life, think of musicians. They are one of the best examples of having determination in not only setting, but also achieving their goals. Athletes don't become record holders by chance - it is only through effective goal setting. Top sales people work consciously at their goals, and as result become star performers. No-one becomes an astronaut by accident.
Every person who becomes successful in whatever field or area they choose, followed a goal path - a map to achieve their success.
Role of an effective goal setting system
If you have a dream, and want to achieve something better in life, having a goal can bring you success.
An effective goal setting system must get you on your road to success. It should also give you the tools to enable you to gain confidence in reaching your goal. There are many books and programs available that can help you set your goal. It is my belief that anyone can set a goal, but the important thing is to reach your goal.
An effective goal setting system should be a blueprint, and enable you to determine where you want to go with your life, and be an aid to keeping you on your goal path.
Having a goal, success is possible. Without goals, success is rarely possible - whatever area in your life.
You will reach your goals.
WHAT ARE YOU SEEING? PROBLEMS OR OPPORTUNITIES
As best I can tell here’s how it breaks down.
Some people see problems as opportunities. Understanding that getting through each opportunity puts them closer to the next one. Kind of going through life with a stair step mentality. Excited to get to the next round of new opportunities because they are seen as ‘steps’ along a pathway. They feel like the bigger the opportunity (problem) the better because that means a bigger step taken. With this outlook they welcome big challenges. They push ahead boldly, as though it were a sporting event in which the opportunities were the opponent.
The opportunity being the thing that must be overcome or conquered in order to move up to higher levels of competition. Thereby bringing higher levels of enjoyment. Enjoying the whole process the way one might enjoy a weekend hobby or the companionship of a loved one. These are the kinds of people who charge out of bed in the mornings because they see the upcoming day as another opportunity to be great.
Conversely there are those who don’t ever want there to be any problems (opportunities). Believing that problems are to be avoided at all costs. In the minds of these people problems are all bad. They see the very occurrence of opportunity as a problem. They get caught up believing that it’s the end of something rather than focusing on the new beginning that lies before them once the challenge is met. These are the people who never confront either themselves or others. They just accept. "Whatever works for you." "If that’s what you want."
These people don’t realize it but they are victims. Accepting what comes instead of actively going to where they want to be. Sometimes they see themselves as peacekeepers. Which is not a bad thing to be but peacemaking would be an even higher aspiration.
Peacemakers lean into conflict. Knowing the only true way to keep peace is by resolving issues through confronting them rather than not. Martin Luther King Jr. was a peacemaker. A peacemaker would rather go through instead of dancing around things. Jesus Christ was a peacemaker. They understand going through is conquering while dancing around is avoiding. Mohandas Gandhi was a peacemaker. Avoiding is putting things off until they are so big and painful that they become, well, unavoidable. I challenge you, as I have challenged myself to stop avoiding things and deal with them. If things in your life aren’t the way you need them to be in order to feel what you need to feel check yourself. Are you resolving or avoiding?
And so the question, Which are you, a peacekeeper or a peacemaker? Do you see opportunities or do you only see problems? Are you busy keeping the peace, or are you actively confronting and resolving those issues in your life that are calling for resolution? How do you view the challenges you are currently facing, annoyances or welcomed opportunities?
Do you look forward to and welcome opportunities that challenge and grow you in the process? Have you accepted the fact that sometimes life is not comfortable but that "real life" happens in the midst of this discomfort? Are you content to accept what life dishes out or are you scratching and clawing in the trenches to pull from life and yourself the things you want and deserve?
Which is it going to be for you, Victim or Victor? The choice is all yours.
I offer these as my final thoughts on the subject:
Those of us who are crazy enough to think we can change the world, our world, are the one’s who will surely do it. If you want to make your world a better place in which to live, start by seizing the opportunities that are right now before you.
Make that telephone call…Write that letter…Confront that person…Then tell them you love them.Accept that setback and move on to the next battle…Share the gift of ‘you’ with somebody, anybody.Forgive…Forget…Do something… Do Anything!Live!!
Thanks for sharing your time with me. I welcome your thoughts, comments.
Live some. Love some. Learn some. Everyday.
You are blessed.
Some people see problems as opportunities. Understanding that getting through each opportunity puts them closer to the next one. Kind of going through life with a stair step mentality. Excited to get to the next round of new opportunities because they are seen as ‘steps’ along a pathway. They feel like the bigger the opportunity (problem) the better because that means a bigger step taken. With this outlook they welcome big challenges. They push ahead boldly, as though it were a sporting event in which the opportunities were the opponent.
The opportunity being the thing that must be overcome or conquered in order to move up to higher levels of competition. Thereby bringing higher levels of enjoyment. Enjoying the whole process the way one might enjoy a weekend hobby or the companionship of a loved one. These are the kinds of people who charge out of bed in the mornings because they see the upcoming day as another opportunity to be great.
Conversely there are those who don’t ever want there to be any problems (opportunities). Believing that problems are to be avoided at all costs. In the minds of these people problems are all bad. They see the very occurrence of opportunity as a problem. They get caught up believing that it’s the end of something rather than focusing on the new beginning that lies before them once the challenge is met. These are the people who never confront either themselves or others. They just accept. "Whatever works for you." "If that’s what you want."
These people don’t realize it but they are victims. Accepting what comes instead of actively going to where they want to be. Sometimes they see themselves as peacekeepers. Which is not a bad thing to be but peacemaking would be an even higher aspiration.
Peacemakers lean into conflict. Knowing the only true way to keep peace is by resolving issues through confronting them rather than not. Martin Luther King Jr. was a peacemaker. A peacemaker would rather go through instead of dancing around things. Jesus Christ was a peacemaker. They understand going through is conquering while dancing around is avoiding. Mohandas Gandhi was a peacemaker. Avoiding is putting things off until they are so big and painful that they become, well, unavoidable. I challenge you, as I have challenged myself to stop avoiding things and deal with them. If things in your life aren’t the way you need them to be in order to feel what you need to feel check yourself. Are you resolving or avoiding?
And so the question, Which are you, a peacekeeper or a peacemaker? Do you see opportunities or do you only see problems? Are you busy keeping the peace, or are you actively confronting and resolving those issues in your life that are calling for resolution? How do you view the challenges you are currently facing, annoyances or welcomed opportunities?
Do you look forward to and welcome opportunities that challenge and grow you in the process? Have you accepted the fact that sometimes life is not comfortable but that "real life" happens in the midst of this discomfort? Are you content to accept what life dishes out or are you scratching and clawing in the trenches to pull from life and yourself the things you want and deserve?
Which is it going to be for you, Victim or Victor? The choice is all yours.
I offer these as my final thoughts on the subject:
Those of us who are crazy enough to think we can change the world, our world, are the one’s who will surely do it. If you want to make your world a better place in which to live, start by seizing the opportunities that are right now before you.
Make that telephone call…Write that letter…Confront that person…Then tell them you love them.Accept that setback and move on to the next battle…Share the gift of ‘you’ with somebody, anybody.Forgive…Forget…Do something… Do Anything!Live!!
Thanks for sharing your time with me. I welcome your thoughts, comments.
Live some. Love some. Learn some. Everyday.
You are blessed.
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